WE MUST ASSUME THIS IS A SATIRICAL LETTER FROM AN IMAGINARY FRENCH CITIZEN

Monsieur Allah be Praised.

I protest the horrid and disgusting remarks about France, our opposition to war, and our alleged cowardice in 1940. Let us be clear. France is the world's leading culture, we stand alone. The intellectual center of the Western World without peer. I am a proud French citizen now living in Coral Springs, Florida for tax reasons. I am fifty years old and feel more than competent to share my feelings regarding the French positions in the current situation. In addition there is no basis for the current accusations that we French engaged in any alleged anti-Semitic or pro Nazi acts during the 40's.

First let me address WWII and our negotiated settlement with the Germans after the Maginot Line had been flanked in 1940. What were we supposed to do? Fight to the death like a bunch of stupid Polaks, slavs, or other EU wannabees? Do counter attacks and risk the loss of millions of acres of grapes? Shoot a bunch of cute German teen agers who were just doing their jobs? We are French. We are the intellectual heart of Europe. We have brains enough to know when we might possibly be beaten. We saved Paris from being bombed. The stupid Brits allowed London to be bombed so they could march around pretending to be brave. Now they have socialized medicine, prostitutes, and McDonalds. So there.

The fault for our "arrangement", if the truth be known, was entirely America's. These revisionist swine now claim we had the largest army in Europe, half again larger than the German army, that we could have fought on. Fought on what? Mules, horses, Citroens? No, we made the best deal we could because the lousy Americans wouldn't come over and fight for us. It was the Americans who were responsible. And we have not fogotten. It was Americas fault. All the Americans who died at Normandy had it coming for not defending us in 1940. They had it coming exactly like 9/11.

Now so far as the American claim that French citizens sent Jews to concentration camps. As we say in France, "Get real". They were very unhappy living under the Germans. They had homes that the less fortunate could live in if Jews weren't living in them. The Jews felt guilty. Jews always feel guilty about something. So some of us sponsored vacation trips to the Black Forest for a few hundred or so. None of this would have happened if the Americans had helped us in 1940. By the time of June in 1943 it was clear that Germany was losing the war. What brilliant French intellectual would send Jews on anything but a fun vacation when they knew that Germany was going to lose? Concentration camps? We thought in our hearts they were going to health spas. When they didn't come back we assumed they got killed in the AMERICAN BOMBING OF CIVILIANS so we took their homes. So what?

No. This, as we say in France, is typical American horse shit. The Jews want their grandparent's homes back? Fuck them. I'd like my great great grandfather's castle back that Napoleon cheated him out of. But you don't hear me whining. Life goes on Zionists. Deal with it. Get the stupid Americans to pay you. Nobody would have died had they stepped in in 1940. Now that there is a World Court, American cowardice in 1940 will be revealed for the world to see.

We are now negotiating again. Paris will not be bombed. Who cares about anything else? Only the stupid ones.

Praise be to monsieur Allah.